In the spirit of Tina Fey

Yay, as I sit and work through the valley of the shadow of the eve, I shall fear no terribly written copy, for I shall write it over again, and write it over better I say.  

And, as the laptop doth burn a red spot upon my ample thighs with its battery warmth, I shall text message my friends and call them unholy, yet affectionate names. Because we women are fickle creatures, and like to degrade each other to show our troth and devotion. Ye trollups of the night, heareth thou what I am saying, eth?  

And lo, though I did eat chocolate pie, and did shoveth my face again with oreos, a fried egg roll, some tater babies, a Sprite, and let us not forgetteth the chicken and dumplings I did bring forth for dinner, I still feel an hungered, and will forage through the cupboards for more sustenance to feed my yearnings. 

I suffereth long over the computer screen. My eyes doth twitch from exhaust, my fingers swelled ripe with fatigue. And as I flitter from work to this epistle and back again, I doth realize that to my bed I should go, a tylenol pm I should imbibe, this section I shall finish and persevere again on the morrow.

Good night, fair maidens. And if thou art not a maiden or a madam of the eve, but a dude instead, I question thine viewing and encourage thee to take a deeper look at thy intentions and manliness forthwith. 

Until we meet again, at yonder later hour, same time, same place tomorrow? 

Farewell.